I am reading about the sea
And I realize my life shares some parallels
With its non-linear space
That sort of fills every crack
with aqueous salty presence.
I felt that today
With no boundaries to define my life
It only existed because I was in it, in a body
Besides that, my life stretched
from one horizon to the next
Met islands and other land masses
Kissed rivers and slept on sandy beaches.
But, there were no definite lines to map its way
I could be put on a map, like the ocean
But, as a subject, I could not be mapped
My life was as a dog pees
Running multi-directional across many planes,
Shapeless, yet nonetheless nurturing the ground.
I hereby committed my life
To be like the sea
It had presence yet lacked a coherent story line
It had depth yet had no beginning, middle nor end
It had mystery and could not be understood.
It was a poem without rhyme
A book with no edges or words.
My life was like the sea.
And this time I embark on it –
This time without judgment
Yes, it should look like something
But even the mere mention of “should look like”
Connotes negative judgment
So, let’s just call me an experiment.
It will change and change again
But most of it has been the meantime.
I stop trying to make sense out of it
I stop trying to buy it clothes
So that I can see what it looks like
It just is an enigma, like the sea.
It has movement,
but who knows where it really goes,
Although I am told sometimes
it goes up to the clouds to hide
And then comes back down again in tears
Perhaps this time the tears have no emotion,
But simply are water droplets
That fall onto a face
Simply because the face is there.